Monday, June 30, 2014


I'm obsessed with this @ninetiesfashionkid instagram.
I want all the clothes from every post.
Here are a few of my favs.

Friday, June 27, 2014

Perfect Body

and this photo was posted a while back.
Definitely a perfect body.
(and an adorable swimsuite)

Thursday, June 26, 2014

PaigeCollins Thin

In honor of the return of Royal Pains on USA Network
I'd like to point out Paige Collins' tiny frame.
Her character is adorable
and so is her body&style.
I love all her clothes&accessories.
So excited to watch the new season.

Wednesday, June 25, 2014

SimpleLife Flashback

Scrolling through Buzzfeed and I ran across this gem.
Oh, how I miss Paris&Nicole
especially once Nicole got to tiny.
They were straightup outrageous&hilarious.
I wish I didn't have anything to do in life but Not Give a Fuck.

Tuesday, June 24, 2014


Trashy Version of a Baby Selfie
my used-to-be-preggo friend did it better.

Monday, June 23, 2014

So True

I'm always looking for something
I definitely know too many girls who've perfected the selfie...

Friday, June 20, 2014

Fatty-Free Bench

I can't remember where I found this picture, but I thought it was wild.
I can't lie, most fat people honestly appall me.
When I see someone in a motorized scooter at the store
carting themselves around purely because they're gigantic
I want to break the scooter.
Or - most angering - are huge parents with huge children.
Not nice.
Needless to say: I dig this bench.
And I always wanted a park created in my honor upon my death.

Thursday, June 19, 2014

Facebookness Revisited

I feel like I need to go back and expand on some posts from last winter.
Take for instance my "Facebookness" post.
It's sad that celebrities have to defend themselves.
I'm definitely a fan of flippin' through US Weekly and checkin' out all the bodies
and I certainly have my opinions while doing so
but to publicly attack&harass someone on their facebook seems wild to me.
I think Miranda Lambert looks great.
I got sick of seeing her picture all over the place for her weightloss
but America loves a good comeback story, so it's no surprise.
I agree with her criticism of "the scale" and appreciate her emphasis on diet&exercise
instead of the pills&cleanses some celebs endorse.
I definitely get bogged down when I see "129lbs" when all I want is "119lbs"
but I know that it's about how I feel and confidence is key.
Secondly, I very irritated with the Tara Lynn rage
mostly because she's so not plus sized in my mind and so many praised her anyway.
And I think this cover was overly photoshopped cos she looks much bigger usually.
But also because of the ignorant things so many people say.
Like I said in my post about Miss USA:
It's sad that we cling to the "bigger" girls.
It's sad that we worship someone for not being thin.
Why do we have to pick a side to latch to at all?
(probably because the population of chubbos we've turned into needs an icon.)

Wednesday, June 18, 2014

Ugh, Breakouts.

I've actually been using Proactiv since March.
I feel like my face got worse for a while there
but it's finally getting better.
Not tanning since fall has definitely
brought out the nature of my skin.
(which isn't necessarily a good thing.)
I've always known that clean eating was key.
I can totally tell when I eat garbage
and my face blows up.
It's like my pours fill with fat&grease&sugar
from the inside
and I look like the shit I shove in my mouth.
So hopefully the combination
of a good cleansing&eating system
will help and I'll finally feel pretty daily.

Tuesday, June 17, 2014

Post-Preggo Skinny

My preggo friend had her baby last month
and sent me a baby-holding, mirror-selfie this afternoon.
Are you kidding me!? -I thought.
She's smaller than me 3-weeks post-birth.
Her legs are toned. Her belly's flat. Her lovehandles don't exist.
Don't get me wrong: I'm totally happy for her and proud of her.
I obvs would never want one of my BF's to get fat
after bringing an adorable little bundle of joy to the world
but I obvs don't want to feel like a fatty next to someone
who just pushed another human being out of her body.
Guess I'll just have to run&diet harder.
We have to at least be equal in size.

Monday, June 16, 2014


Speaking of that tenant I had, I think I should go on a little rant about her. She was terrible. She'd order huge meals then not eat any and give it all to her boyfriend. She'd pretend like she loved junkfood&snacks to "fit in with the guys," but she'd never actually eat anything in front of anyone. (though there were quite a few times I saw her sneaking donuts&cookies from the office lunchroom.) She was always on a cleanse or trying some type of new laxative tea, but then she'd say, "I've never done this before - my mom bought it for me." (yeah, sure. just OWN YOUR SHIT, please!) She never exercised and when she did she wore tons of layers to "sweat more weight off." (cause that water weight didn't come right back as soon as you drank anything.) She was basically the definition of bad-body-habits and everything I hate in a girl who pretends not to diet or care but clearly does and has no idea what she's doing. Yet, most importantly, she was straight up mean. I got her a job and she treated me like garbage ...expecting me to drive her to work without gas money or enough respect to get in my car on time in the mornings. Once she started skipping all the time to hang out with her boyfriend or play up an illness, they fired her and she blamed me. She parked in my spot in my driveway. She ran a space heater day&night to sky-rocket my electricity bill without increasing her monthly rent payment. She barely paid her monthly rent payments in full or on time. She took too many showers too often for too long and insisted on doing a million tiny loads of laundry. She was basically the devil in a bitchy, soft-bodied twenty-something-year-old with lofty goals for thin but not enough ambition for follow-through. Now though, in my daily runs, I tell myself to look better than her. I keep her love-handles tattooed in my memory to motivate me to properly take care of myself, my body, and my fitness, so I'm not scrambling to flatten out for a bikini at a weekend pool party. She's one of those girls who was born with chicken legs and bony arms, but maintains her unnatural characteristics terribly and I will never look like her. I am toned&tiny and successful&confident through hardwork&dedication and I will never look like a marshmallow on toothpicks. And I will never act like the spawn of satin to someone who's opened their home to me. End rant.

Friday, June 13, 2014

Sick Thin

Here's another post I had drafted
and never posted in the fall/winter.
Is it bad that I want a cold
so I can lose my tastebuds&appetite?
Being sick is an easy way to get thin
especially as the weather is cold.
I got sick right after I started half marathon training
and I think it did do me some good.
It wasn't fun to run with sniffles&sneezing
but not being able to taste anything
makes eating much less appealing.
I lived on monster&halls
and I felt pretty tiny&frail.
This past winter I had tenants in my basement.
They sucked.
My Mr.'s high school friend & his girlfriend.
Since the Mr.&I weren't even together:
it was awkward.
Since the girlfriend was a wanna-be-anorexic bitch:
it was annoying.
I'm glad they're gone.
But, anyway, she was always sick
and using it as an excuse to turn down food
and using it as a reason to avoid work
and using it as sympathy for attention from her bf.
At least I was only sick for a week
and I still ran between 3-7 miles every day.

Thursday, June 12, 2014

Thighs & Diet

I bought this book forever ago.
I think I'll finally read it.
I can't say it'll be too useful with my training,
but the thinspo can't hurt.
And the pyramid below looks beautiful
especially with my training.
Lots of liquids&supplements
to boost my energy and restore my muscles.
I've got this.

Wednesday, June 11, 2014

Rules of Chub

I watched Rules of Engagement (a pretty funny show) on Netflix last fall and scheduled this post but never posted it. Here it is. I do remember thinking Bianca Kajlich got chubby throughout the course of the show. Maybe it's because her imdb bio says her first marriage was ending around that time? I can definitely relate to a failing relationship affecting my body.

“How’s Jennifer’s diet going?” - Russel
“Not good. This morning I caught her eating a
hot chocolate packet&butter.” - Jeff
Rules of Engagement S4E6
I could never say that she's fat,
but she's definitely not tiny...
especially not in season 4.
I still like the show, though.

Tuesday, June 10, 2014

The New "Normal"

I think it's admirable that so many people applauded her confidence in an imperfect body. I, though, would not want her body. And I find it kind of sad that Americans jump so quickly to the defense of a "normal" girl while shamefully scolding the "skinny" ones. Can't everyone just be beautiful? Does anyone need to be praised for their curves ...or scrutinized for their bones? I feel like it defeats the purpose to pump up someone plumper just to sink those who are smaller. Mekayla Diehl certainly looked great and I'm not here to criticize, but I'm also not here to chose the biggest girl as the best just because she's "normal."  Also, scrolling through all the swimwear pictures, there were a lot of the girls who looked "normal."

Monday, June 9, 2014

Wedding Weightloss

A girl I went to high school with got married over the weekend.
Now I know a lot changed from high school to now...
(2008 was 8 whole years ago!)
but I've seen this girl recently & she hadn't changed that much.
On her wedding day, though,
her pre-wedding diet&running regimen definitely shined through.
She was never a "big" girl, but she looked skeletal.
Her soft body had lost every ounce of extra
exposing only her skin&bones
even her hipbones protruded under her lace&sparkly dress.
Obvs, I'm envious of her new&tiny look,
but she's not the first girl I've seen shrink substantially for her big day
and (generally) they pack it back on after the fact
so I'll have to keep a look out.
For her sake, I hope she maintains a healthy weight.
It's sad to think she'll forever look back on her wedding pictures
and never be as small as she was that one day
but maintaining that body when it's just not natural seems awful.
Good for her, though.

Sunday, June 8, 2014

Week 1 (Days 539-546)

Monday-Friday Breakfast:
Banana Flaxseed Muffin - 200cals
Monday-Friday Snack:
Peanut Butter Banana Smoothie - 200cals
Monday-Thursday Lunch:
Hummus or Egg Salad Wrap - 300cals
Monday&Tuesday Dinner:
Wednesday Dinner:
Veggie Hotdogs - 500cals
Kettle Cook BBQ Chips - 200cals
Wednesday Dessert:
Sugar Free Russel Stovers - 200cals
Thursday Dinner:
Calzone - 300cals
Friday Lunch:
Greek Salad - 500cals
Friday Dinner:
Cheezits - 200cals
Saturday Breakfast&Dinner:
Saturday Lunch:
Summer Salads @ Potluck - 500cals
Saturday Snack:
Popcorn - 300cals
Sunday Breakfast:
Cinnamon Roll - 200cals
Sunday Lunch:
Grilled Cheese & Fries - 500cals
Sunday Dinner:
Half a Doughnut - 200cals
Total Intake: 4,300cals
20 Miles Ran - 1 Spin Class - 3,500cals Burned
Net: 800cals

A positive net is NO GOOD.
I need to be netting negative.
All this running and hard work
and I'm just drowning it with food.
This week I'll do better.
(and have much less to type!)
Sadly, I got on the scale over the weekend
(for the first time in a long time)
and the number wasn't pretty.
At 5'3" that's not huge but not tiny.
The Mr. says it's because I'm "muscular"
and the only way I'll shrink is a "perfect diet."
Only a negative net will decrease that number.

Friday, June 6, 2014


Not to toot my own horn,
but I think I'm doing excellent
with this half marathon training.
We did 5 miles last night.
First of all, I was barely out of breath ever.
Secondly, I kicked ass on the last 2 blocks:
s-t-r-e-t-c-h-i-n-g my stride
and carrying myself away from the Mr.
He said there was no way he could catch me,
which is nice to hear, cause he's very prideful.
3 quick miles this morning then 6 tomorrow.
I'm gonna kill this half marathon in 45 days.
I'm going to be thin&fit&tiny
and I'm going to conquer my goal
looking adorable while doing it - no doubt.
I've been cranking this on my commute
and repeating it throughout my runs.
Great tune. <3

Thursday, June 5, 2014


I really wish The OC was on Netflix.
It's such a great thinspo show
and a wonderful summer-time show.
I should just buy it...
But it's so expensive
and I already own a million boxsets.
I watched Melrose Place 2.0 this week.
The series (an extension of Melrose from the 90's)
only lasted for one 18-episode season
but it was full of thin girls in TightDresses&TinyBikinis
and really made me want to go back to LA.
A nice moderate climate
and a surrounding of beautiful&fit people
is also a thinspiration living choice.

Wednesday, June 4, 2014

Half Marathon Training

The Mr.&I decided to train for a half marathon.
Well, basically, I decided and made a schedule
and he agreed since he's fat and needs the incentive.
April 29 was Day 1: a 4 mile fartlek.
I killed it on the straight away sprints
15 out of 16 - I kicked his butt.
And the rest is walking & slow jogging,
so that was easy enough.
I've actually felt pretty good
guess my cycling the past months has
"kept"my legs in shape.
I'll try to keep updates on the other 80 days.

Tuesday, June 3, 2014


I think my strict daily blogging rule
is what allows me to fall away so easily.
I get discouraged with a few days of catch-up
then give up entirely.
...not that any of you beautifuls have set these lofty goals for me...
so I think I'll cut back.
Maybe a weekly food&exercise log instead of daily
and more posts when I "feel it"
not because I have to.
To be honest, though, I didn't give up on my ambitions
even though I neglected .BeneathBones. so terribly.
My birthday was buried in these past 5 months
and I didn't even binge or gain.
I'm not sure what I weigh ...honestly.
I was going to get on the scale
...the battery was dead...
so I took it as a sign and stepped off.
I was fitted for a friend's bridesmaid dress
size 4
and since those dressed always run small
that was satisfying.
And I've consistently been running&spinning.
Gotta work a little more on my intake
but I'm not displeased.
And I've missed you, followers.
I will try to be better.

Monday, June 2, 2014


I went MIA for a while
(Missing In Action - not Mia ...I wish, though.)
The boy&I basically called it quits.
He was being really shitty&useless
and I was sick of feeling like nothing&nobody.
I'd like to say I starved the frustration out of me.
But that isn't true.
I haven't gained, but I haven't lost.
I was mostly stagnant - in a blackout - doing nothing
well, besides drinking&laying
till about a month ago...
No good.
Now - I suppose - we're better,
though we have a long way to go if we wanna make it.
So, I've decided to wake back up.
Time to get my shit together
and pull myself to the surface.
Maybe I'll weigh myself next Monday.
Soon I'll expound upon my goals&motivations.
Summer's almost here...
thank fucking gawd.