Thin Ex

My brother's gold-digging ex-girlfriend recently got engaged.

Based on her body language, she looks really into him.

(not.)

When she dated my brother, she always drove me crazy.

She'd order huge portions then just pick at it without eating any.

Then she'd go on&on about how she had such a big appetite

and how she always ate so much.

I wanted to scream: no you don't! who do you think you're fooling!?



Silly Shirt

I thought this was funny

until I went on a girls weekend and made out with a guy from the bar

(or so I've been told - I was too hammered to remember)

...now the thought of anyone but my boyfriend on top of me nauseates me.

I guess I can only live&learn

(and stop drinking so much)

and never do that again.

I do think this shirt is silly, though.

And since I doubt I'll ever run into Theo James throughout my life,

it's probably not a realistic thing to worry about anyway.

TenantRant

Speaking of that tenant I had, I think I should go on a little rant about her. She was terrible. She'd order huge meals then not eat any and give it all to her boyfriend. She'd pretend like she loved junkfood&snacks to "fit in with the guys," but she'd never actually eat anything in front of anyone. (though there were quite a few times I saw her sneaking donuts&cookies from the office lunchroom.) She was always on a cleanse or trying some type of new laxative tea, but then she'd say, "I've never done this before - my mom bought it for me." (yeah, sure. just OWN YOUR SHIT, please!) She never exercised and when she did she wore tons of layers to "sweat more weight off." (cause that water weight didn't come right back as soon as you drank anything.) She was basically the definition of bad-body-habits and everything I hate in a girl who pretends not to diet or care but clearly does and has no idea what she's doing. Yet, most importantly, she was straight up mean. I got her a job and she treated me like garbage ...expecting me to drive her to work without gas money or enough respect to get in my car on time in the mornings. Once she started skipping all the time to hang out with her boyfriend or play up an illness, they fired her and she blamed me. She parked in my spot in my driveway. She ran a space heater day&night to sky-rocket my electricity bill without increasing her monthly rent payment. She barely paid her monthly rent payments in full or on time. She took too many showers too often for too long and insisted on doing a million tiny loads of laundry. She was basically the devil in a bitchy, soft-bodied twenty-something-year-old with lofty goals for thin but not enough ambition for follow-through. Now though, in my daily runs, I tell myself to look better than her. I keep her love-handles tattooed in my memory to motivate me to properly take care of myself, my body, and my fitness, so I'm not scrambling to flatten out for a bikini at a weekend pool party. She's one of those girls who was born with chicken legs and bony arms, but maintains her unnatural characteristics terribly and I will never look like her. I am toned&tiny and successful&confident through hardwork&dedication and I will never look like a marshmallow on toothpicks. And I will never act like the spawn of satin to someone who's opened their home to me. End rant.

Sick Thin

Here's another post I had drafted

and never posted in the fall/winter.

Is it bad that I want a cold

so I can lose my tastebuds&appetite?

Being sick is an easy way to get thin

especially as the weather is cold.

Ironically,

I got sick right after I started half marathon training

and I think it did do me some good.

It wasn't fun to run with sniffles&sneezing

but not being able to taste anything

makes eating much less appealing.

I lived on monster&halls

and I felt pretty tiny&frail.

This past winter I had tenants in my basement.

They sucked.

My Mr.'s high school friend & his girlfriend.

Since the Mr.&I weren't even together:

it was awkward.

Since the girlfriend was a wanna-be-anorexic bitch:

it was annoying.

I'm glad they're gone.

But, anyway, she was always sick

and using it as an excuse to turn down food

and using it as a reason to avoid work

and using it as sympathy for attention from her bf.

Gross.

At least I was only sick for a week

and I still ran between 3-7 miles every day.